Gary L. Simmons  rev 12/31/03
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Archived News for the Month of December 2003

News of the Day


12-31: Have a safe night, designated driver, full body condom, and a couple aspirin in your watch pocket for tomorrow. Happy New Year!!

12-29: Looks like it is 44 more lashes for Termie. That is how many competitors we fell behind this week. Someone pry him loose from the computer game he got for Christmas, Halo, and lash him to the mizzen mast! At least in Halo he is blasting space aliens to kingdom come, it sort of makes up for all the sticky sweet "looking and hoping" that's been the meat and potatoes on the Team SETI page. So take a seat in the Hobbies department and lets get this flogging started!

12-25: Jesus our saviour is born! Merry Christmas!

12-23: Not much is going to be happening at the House of Wacks this week due to the Christmas holidays. The Joke of the Weak will be updated every day.

12-22: I was afraid that Termie was going to get a couple more lashes this week as his Deus Ex playing seemed to be eating up all the processor time to the exclusion of the SETI@home project in the Hobbies department. He is off the hook however as Team SETI still managed to whop 43 competitors. I guess a lot of them are busy this time of year playing reindeer games too.

12-19: The Deux Ex computer game crowd and those of the laissez-faire persuasion will understand. I am off saving the world from the evil world governments. Using my UNATCO nano-technology, I have managed to remotely update the Joke of the Weak. Actually, in reality, there is a lot of behind the scenes work going on in the Marathon department. Stay tuned for further updates on that front.

12-18: Ironically, in the days just before the highly anticipated computer game "Halo" is released, I have started up a new game of an old classic "Deus Ex". I had just received new information at the MacAddict forums on how to fix the vexing "light ray" problem that have for years made the game unplayable with a Radeon 8500 video card. "Deus Ex" has unforgivably obsessive game play. Any lack of web site updates may be attributed to this phenomena.

12-17: Enemies of the Second Amendment intend the exact result of their actions. Make no mistake about it, anti-gunners actually do want to rub out private gun ownership for everyone! Our Constitution is clear. The words "the people" cannot mean one thing in the Second Amendment and something entirely different in the eight other times they are used in the Constitution. Robinson B. Kane helps us understand the enemy, the anti-second amendment gun grabbers on the President's Column in the NRA section of the Extra department.

12-16: I only gave it a little mention yesterday but the capture of Saddam Hussein on Saturday is fabulous news. Hats off to the men and women of the US Armed Forces! The House of Wacks is very proud of you. Maybe now the Iraqi's can exercise the demon of Saddam that has been possessing their country and get on with nation building in a new and free Iraq without the threat of him and his unholy sons ever returning to power. God bless the Iraqi people, they've been through hell.

12-15: Good news for Termie, the project leader for Team SETI. He has been released from the brig and given his first ration of real food in a week. This after the news that Team SETI has struggled ahead of 46 competitors in the last week. Although not great news like the capture yesterday of that rat in a hole, Saddam, it is nonetheless good news. Feel free to visit the Team SETI page in the Hobbies department for the lowdown.

12-12: Up today in the Art Portfolio section of the Hobbies department is an old yellowed drawing of some idiot checking out a sewer grating. What going on there? Better check it out, if love is in your heart, you will want to harvest the warm fuzzies sprouting from this graphic. Look for it on the High School Art page.

12-11: Today is the day Bungie Studios long awaited computer game "Halo" ships for the Mac. If you need me I will be on the front porch waiting for my pre-order to arrive. Go read the Joke of the Weak and for goodness sake, leave UPS alone, they are busy with something more important!

12-10: You need to hear the story of Tony Martin, an English farmer who killed a burglar and wounded another when 3 career criminals broke into his home and started ransacking it.   Tony was sentenced to life in prison, the burglars with a total of 80 arrests and convictions, were out in months.   This is where America is headed, we are taking the same path the English did and you can read for yourself how very wrong it is on the Standing Guard page in the NRA section of the Extra department.

12-8: Team SETI had a setback this week. There was a double whammy of the SETI server being down a day from this location and then another day was lost when my new printer/scanner totally trashed my system forcing a daylong system install. As a result, Team SETI not only didn't gain in the standing, we fell behind by 14. Coincidently, that is the same number of lashes Termie is got with the Cat-O-Nine-Tails! All hands are required to watch the corporal punishment, today on the poop deck in the Team SETI section of the Hobbies department.

12-5: Here is your assignment for today. Enjoy a laugh at the Joke of the Weak then go have a great weekend.

12-4: The last of the Chris Komarnicki Killing Time Tutorials goes live today and this marks the end of the gigantic conversion to HTML 4.01 Transitional except for something I might find here and there that I forgot about. Going live in the Forge Tips section of the Battle Cat's Litterbox are the Unique Terminals and Arches tutorials.

12-3: Studies indicate that firearms are used more than 2 millions times a year for legal personal protection, and that the presence of a firearm, without a shot being fired, prevents crime in many instances. You can read newspaper articles about some of these accounts on the Armed Citizen page in the NRA section of the Extra department.

12-2: Time for the second to the last installment of Chris Komarnicki Killing Time Tutorials conversion to HTML 4.01 Transitional. Today's fare is Flashlights and Laser Sights. These are some very interesting effects that will add nicely to your Marathon scenario. See for yourself at the Forge Tips section of the Battle Cat's Litterbox.

12-1: Picture a field of 152 daisies. Now imagine the roots of each daisy extending down 6 feet into the dead sunken chests of the competitors that bellied up in the knock-down-drag-out that is SETI@home. Not to worry, Termie is on guard against grave robbing hunchbacks. It is happening on the Team SETI page in the Hobbies department.


No news on the weekends. As usual, the Team SETI page is updated every Monday. The NRA pages: President's Column, Standing Guard and Armed Citizen are updated each month.
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