Gary L. Simmons  rev 06/30/2001
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Archived News for the Month of June 2001

New this Week:

6-26: I have a new chili recipe for you hot heads out there. I first saw this in a little out of the way Mexican food restaurant 10 years ago and only recently saw it packaged in a grocery store allowing me to scarf the ingredients and recreate it on my own. This is some really simple but good stuff. Check out the Pico De Gallo recipe on the Chili Pepper page over in the Hobbies section.

6-22: Marathon fans: Just when you thought it was safe to conquor a planet and enslave the occupants, John Sumner rides again! Watch as John single handedly knuckles the craniums of Troopers and Enforcers while dancing the Fandango around them. This is John. See John swim through lava. Swim John swim! Download the D-Day vid film and see it done in style. Go to the Marathon section, click on the D-Day link on the left and scroll down to the bottom. Enjoy.

6-20: Hey the Grim Reaper interviews me in the news. Go check it out!

6-18: Yipes! I just sailed past the 97 percent mark over on the SETI page over in the Hobbies section! I have now done more work crunching data for SETI than 97 percent of the people working on the project. Lemme see if there are 3 million people working on crunching data then that means I'm in the coveted top 90,000!! WOW, talk about an exclusive sea of faces!! Don't feel left out, you can join too. Directions are on the SETI page.

6-14: I received an e-mail from a patron of the Web Building page asking me a JavaScript question. In answering his question I realized I did not have a JavaScript link along with the others in the Web Building page. So anyway, now there is one, a nice resource for those wishing to explore more JavaScript than is discussed in the various Web Building pages.

6-12: NRA president Charlton Heston discuses the "Millennial Generation" in the President's Column over on the NRA page. Heston is referring to the book, "Millennials Rising", by authors Neil Howe and William Strauss who call these kids "the next great generation." The key to American freedoms is in their hands. The decision to give them away or protect them is ultimately up to them. Read about it. Think about it.

6-11: Timmy McVeigh got his this morning. I heard they were going to cremate his body afterwards, I suppose they thought his earthly remains were jealous of his unearthly remains. Make' em a matching set eh? Hey if you ask me they should take his corpse out in the desert and blow it up. That would be cool. Let the jackals lick it up: "Mmmm... minty arf."

6-8: How important is the first amendment to you? Do you mind if your political free speech is taken out of your hands and put into the hands of an elitist big media? Do you mind being forced to shut up and let someone else who does not represent you speak in your place? Do you mind that the Supreme Courts decision of 1976 saying that restrictions on spending for issue advocacy was unconstitutional is being ignored by the Congress? If you said no to any of the above then you need to go find a nice brutal totalitarian dictatorship somewhere and leave the rest of us freedom loving people to govern ourselves. Leave it to the government to punish EVERYBODY except the actual corrupt government officials who are accepting bribes and illegal campaign finance funds. It can't get more twisted than this. Read about it on the Standing Guard page in the NRA section.

6-6: I realized while putting an embedded sound in my member profile page that I had screwed up the syntax of the HTML that I gave on the Sounds page of the Web Building section. I have fixed my mistake and to atone for my sins I have added some more sound info that will help you put some cool sound stuff on your web pages.

6-5: Once again we see how an armed society is a polite society on the Armed Citizen section of the NRA page. Be it suddenly quiet and polite rabid raccoons or miraculously transformed home invaders who could just kick themselves for their impolite thinking. I'm not saying that packing heat is never having to say you are sorry, it's just that it is pretty spectacular how a little inanimate metal lump in the proper hands can instill so much of Miss Manners into even the worst societal misfits.

6-4: The SETI page over in the Hobbies sections marks a milestone of 6,000 hours of compute time. SETI stands for the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence and although I would recommend that we start looking here first, you too can help looking there with the rest of us in the "have no life" club. It's easy to do, not like you gotta stand there in the snow and turn a crank all night, just go to the SETI page and read the blurb and you are on your way to crunching radio telescope data. Cool, eh?

6-1: June, the month named by the Gods after Beaver's mom. Today summer stretches ahead like the endless baked, cracked mud of a desert floor. Each festive summer occasion looms like the sun butchered bones of the bewildered beasts that gave them up to their stolid tormentor. Summer. From the choking acrid smoke of a blackened BBQ hamburger to the endless backyard shrieks and bickerings of your neighbors squalid brats to the merciless sun bleached traffic jams where you squirm on the melted naugahyde car seat, sticky with grit and filth, your dry, swollen tongue rasping over your split bleeding lips. Criminy, I'm gonna cry, at least there's bikinis to look forward to! But then there's fat chicks in short shorts!! OHHHHH BOO HOO HOO HOO!!

As usual, the Joke of the Weak is updated every weekday by 8AM PST and the SETI page is updated every Monday. The NRA pages President's Column, Standing Guard and Armed Citizen are updated each month.
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